Beatitudes Part 3
A look at the Beatitudes in the Natural Systems Scale for Congregations, sub-dimension three: Connectedness.
Connectedness comes in two parts. The first is simply that individual people in the unit – whether that unit is a family or a congregation or a community or a work setting – are in relationship with one another. The second involves the quality of the relationships, with more mature units showing both tolerance and interest in one another’s views. Lower levels of connectedness are characterized by less tolerance and more insistence on agreement: resulting in various levels of distancing and cutoff for the family or congregation.
The Beatitude most closely related to connectedness is Matthew 5:9, Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. For those of us raised in the 1960s, peacemakers may bring up images of protesters and demonstrations about the Viet Nam war. I do not wish to discount these actions, nor anyone dedicated to peacemaking on a national and international level. Certainly today’s news only increased our awareness of the urgent need for peacemakers at these levels.
However, here I am talking about peacemaking at a much more granular level. How can families and congregational members talk to each other about our differences? Many of us are managing by staying with ‘safe’ topics. But does that bring peace to the world? I think not. I think avoiding anything where we might disagree is far from peacemaking.
How, then, does one become a peacemaker? Certainly, that is a question for each of us to consider. How do I, in my time and place, connect with others on anything more than a superficial level? It starts within, sorting out how one sees things, being at peace with oneself and one’s own ideas. More than that, though, one must be at peace with the idea that someone else might see it differently! Cultivating a habit of respect for others, with a genuine interest in their views, is part of becoming a peacemaker.
Remember the story (Matthew 25:1-13) of the five wise and five foolish bridesmaids? The foolish bridesmaids came to the wedding unprepared, asking the wise to share their oil. The wise said no. A wonderful sermon about this reading notes that some things can’t be shared.
It’s interesting that the wise in the story seem so unconcerned about the foolish. They waste no effort trying to shore them up in any way, neither scolding them nor making up for their lack of oil nor otherwise convincing them of the error of their ways. They seem detached or indifferent about the plight of the foolish. Perhaps the wise recognize the pain of the foolish as part of the journey of life. Perhaps the wise themselves have spent some time shut out from the wedding party, in the ‘wailing and gnashing of teeth’ camp, eventually deciding live otherwise. Perhaps the wise recognize the process of growth itself as what led them to become the children of God, as scripture describes them. When is it wise to be comfortable about the challenges others face? Maybe more often than we think. I am not sure.
What I am sure about is that peacemakers fall into the category of the wise. They act responsibly in their own lives. And they act responsibly towards others, working towards understanding their views. They respect others. They listen.
In perhaps the ultimate paradox, peacemakers bring peace to the extent that they are able to welcome conflict. They stay connected – listening – to everyone in a group. Nothing scares them. They are in relationship with each and every person involved in a conflict. Because they do not take responsibility for anyone besides themselves, they are able to stay in contact with all.
Respecting the autonomy of others is a humble posture. How easy (and arrogant!) it is to judge another. Sometimes, noticing one’s own reactions and taming them – the self-emptying posture of the saints – is required. Sometimes, I think, one is also called to comment: I see this differently. There are times when defining one’s own views is part of peacemaking. One can offer additional information or another way of seeing a problem without insisting that anyone agrees. Sometimes asking a question can provide the freedom necessary to open a dialogue.
How is connectedness enhanced? Who are the peacemakers among us? Can congregations become places where people can talk with one another about things that matter to them? Are the Beatitudes a community project? In my view, these are the questions the church must ask itself in the 21st century.
